Dim

The emotional swings from high to low and back again are exhausting. Mike did great on Sunday at  Sunday school, church, and lunch, then took a nap and woke up zinging. The repeating has been so bad the last 3 days that I’m about to go crazy!

Monday morning he was awful with Kallyn, who arrived early so that Mom and I could spend the day in Richmond, looking for a mother-of-the-groom dress. He was pushing, repeating, and grabbing. It took both of us to get him dressed and then I decided to just let him walk it off upstairs since he wouldn’t come down or calm down.  When left alone, he started throwing things down the stairs, including his iPad – a royal temper tantrum, in my opinion. Thankfully, the iPad just kept right on playing. After Mom and I left, he threw things outside and while Kallyn was going to pick them up, he locked her out of the house.  He is smart and obviously knows what he’s doing to some degree, because he ran around to the front door and locked that before she could get there. Today I was with him the entire day, and other than first thing this morning, and last thing tonight when he was repeating, he has done very well. However, I CANNOT be with him 24/7, especially when he doesn’t want/can't do anything productive and if I talk to anyone or try to do something the repeating starts. 

We had an appointment with Dr. Silver and Mike was fairly clear. Asking why we were there and saying he was tall enough to drive and could see fine. ????  Dr. Silver prescribed Ritalin to try to help Mike focus and cut down on the repeating.  However, there is an issue that the pharmacy has to clear with the doctor and so I couldn’t get the prescription tonight.  This could make things better or worse. Am not really looking forward to trying yet another medicine.

A family friend, is trying to be an advocate for us, and I am so appreciative.  He is looking into various facilities and programs and talking to lots of folks. Tracey has brought me information on some residential places and we have an appointment at 2pm tomorrow at one of those.  At the very least, I hope to get Mike somewhere for a month or so for respite, but am actually thinking he may have to go live somewhere.  I just cannot keep this up. Tracey also told me about a retreat center that I hope to go to as soon as I can find somewhere for Mike to go. Solitude and silence are greatly coveted by me right now.

Isaiah 30:15

This is what the Sovereign Lord, the Holy One of Israel, says: “In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength, but you would have none of it.”