Miraculous Christmas

Just a quick note with lots of praise and thanks to God for how miraculously well Mike is doing. Having a wonderful hotel Christmas with most of the Rices and a very calm and clear Mike. Woo hoo! ! Best Christmas present I (we) could receive. Thank you Jesus! !

Our Christmas Card to You

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

May each and every one of you have a wonderful celebration of the birth of our Lord Jesus Christ, remembering that He came to give us eternal life through His death and resurrection. God gave us the greatest gift ever when He sent Jesus to earth. It truly is a Merry Christmas!

I am excited and a little nervous about our Christmas plans. The Ohio Rices', Keegan, Amy, Mike, and I are all spending Christmas together at a hotel in Roanoke. We will pick Mike up on Tuesday and take him back on Thursday. Please be in prayer that this will be a miraculously blessed time and that Mike will be calm and able to enjoy the time together. I saw him for a few hours last Thursday along with my friend, Debbie, and most of the time he did great. May the Lord grant that these times will continue and become more and more frequent.

Just this weekend, it has been decided that Mike and I will move in with my brother and his wife, Hugh & Tracey. This will be a quieter location away from the main workings of the farm.  They are away from home most of the day so it will be a peaceful place for me to work with Mike, plus if necessary, they would be able to help at times. We hope to have Mike home by mid-January or earlier. We have a great Primary Care Physician, but I need to find the other doctors necessary for Mike's care like a neuro-psychologist and/or neuro-psychiatrist, and possibly a neurologist. I am also in contact with an agency for in-home assistance. If you live in the Richmond, Petersburg, or Farmville area and have any knowledge good or bad of these types of doctors or in-home agencies, I would appreciate your input. My e-mail address is mcjrrice@gmail.com. Please also be praying about this transition. 

Since everyone knows how our year has been, our Christmas card to you is a short skit that the Lord gave to me for the Grace UMC Christmas Community Gathering which I will copy and past below. I love you and appreciate each of you so very much. Merry Christmas!

IT'S ALL ABOUT JESUS!!

It’s all about Jesus. Do you know that?  I mean REALLY know that?! Christmas is Jesus.  Jesus IS Christmas! Jesus, God’s Son. Think about that for a minute. The Son of God!! God, the Almighty, the maker of heaven and earth. Our creator! The reason that we are breathing right now!  Jesus, who was with His Father…GOD… gave up His life of glory to be born a baby here on earth. We like to romanticize it, but it was a stable, with smelly animals, manure, straw, hay, maybe even some mice. Jesus left His glorious home in heaven to be born to human parents in a smelly stable. The Holy Son of God, transformed into a human baby for us.

Yeah, a baby. God likes to do things in unusual ways. The Apostle Matthew tells us that when Joseph discovered that Mary was going to have a baby, “he had in mind to divorce her quietly.” BUT…”an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, ‘Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins’.”  This took place to fulfill what the prophet Isaiah said, “The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel.” Immanuel means “God with us.”… GOD WITH US!.... He is right here…. with us! Amazing!

I was just reading in Luke chapter 2. Luke tells us that an angel of the Lord also appeared to shepherds living out in the fields and they were terrified! The glory of the Lord was so bright that it lit up all around them. The angel said: “Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a SAVIOR has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord.” Then a huge gathering of angels praised God and said “Glory to God in the highest and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests.”

This is so true!  When we believe and accept all the Bible tells us about Jesus, our Spirit is at peace and rest. And you know the best part?  This is true for all eternity, not just here.  Christmas is just the beginning of the story of Jesus on earth. He lived a sinless life as God’s Son, giving us an example to follow. His death on the cross, paid the penalty (or price) for all of our sins. His resurrection from the dead conquered death and Satan once and for all and gives us reason to rejoice! His victory over death gives eternal life to all who believe and accept Him.

It IS ALL about Jesus. It always has been, from the very beginning. Jesus IS Christmas. Without him there is no hope, no eternal life, no party, no celebration.  Jesus came to be our Savior, our Redeemer, our Lord. With Jesus, there is life, abundant life both now and forever.

God loves us so much, all we have to do is believe and receive as He tells us in John: “For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through Him. Whoever believes in Him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because he has not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son.”

Do you believe? Don’t delay. Don’t miss out! Jesus is holding His gift of salvation out to you. His arms are out-stretched, the price has been paid - all you have to do is reach out and receive it. He loves you so much and He wants you to have it. That’s why He came. The very first Christmas gift was from God to us and it was enough. His gift was Jesus! JESUS is Christmas!

There’s a great Christmas hymn that tells the message we’re talking about. Come on everybody let’s sing  “Come Thou Long Expected Jesus”.

Characters and audience sing: “Come Thou Long Expected Jesus” by Charles Wesley

1.         Come, thou long expected Jesus,

            born to set thy people free;

            from our fears and sins release us,

            let us find our rest in thee. 

            Israel's strength and consolation,

            hope of all the earth thou art;

            dear desire of every nation,

            joy of every longing heart.

2.         Born thy people to deliver,

            born a child and yet a King,

            born to reign in us forever,

            now thy gracious kingdom bring.

            By thine own eternal spirit

            rule in all our hearts alone;

            by thine all sufficient merit,

            raise us to thy glorious throne.

A Good Friday

Last Friday, Faye (a friend from church) and I drove up to see Mike and spend a few hours with him.  He was playing Sequence when we arrived and then got stuck on "my wife is here". However, once we went back to his room and I started pulling out articles of clothing that I brought to him, he stopped repeating and started putting things away in his drawers or hanging them in his closet. I had brought a newsletter from missionary friends of ours, plus his college magazine, etc. Instead of reading the newsletter, he immediately wanted to tape it to his wall. While the LST went to get some tape, I started reading the letter to him and then he sat beside me and read the rest of it himself. Once done, he taped it to his wall where he has family photos and other newsletters and cards. I am so appreciative to everyone who continues to write to him. I think he enjoys the mail very much, and the staff is jealous of how much mail he receives! Thank you!

After the letter, I gave him his Asbury University magazine, and he started reading an article. Lisa (CM) came to get me so that I could meet with her and Srdj (RN) for an update. I told Mike I would be back in a little while and he continued to read aloud.  The staff has seen improvement in the last 2 weeks or so. Less aggression, better cognition. Dr. Rooker has slowly increased the Depakote and Seroquel to a therapeutic level and is maintaining it there for now. When I returned to the room, Mike was still reading....the same paragraph over and over.  I put my finger on the next paragraph and started reading that and he then picked up there and continued to the end of the article even flipping the page and starting on the next one.  I wish I had tried to see if he could remember anything he read, but I didn't think of that at the time.

We tried to see if he would like to go out to lunch, but when we attempted to close the magazine or take it, he became agitated and so Faye and I just went and brought lunch back to him. He ate the majority of his lunch and then we went for a walk. While walking, he remembered some things he needed from the store so wanted to turn around. His conversation was appropriate and clear. He is very impatient, but was much easier to distract and did not become aggressive when having to wait for the car. At Wal-Mart, he knew exactly what he wanted, and did much better at being aware of others and not bull-dozing straight ahead. The lines were long and slow. Mike said to me "Tell me candidly, do you want to live in Virginia? Then start looking for a house for us." He was so much clearer cognitively, but still has no awareness of his mental limitations or un-cognitive times. Thankfully, he let us know that he needed to go to the bathroom (hurray!) so the LST, Amanda, took him while Faye and I waited in line. We had barely moved when they returned and so Mike looked at Amanda and asked "Do we have a car?" Amanda - "yes." Mike - "Then lets go, they can take care of this."

By the time we returned, it was about time for us to head back home. Mike was just finishing his snack of homemade fruitcake that Mom and I had made, so I told him Faye and I were going to have to leave soon. He said "Then go." So we did! I kissed him and told him I loved him. He followed us to the door, gave me a hug and kiss and told me he loved me.  Before we could pull out of the parking space, he had come out and kissed me through the window then walked back to the building. When we turned to drive by the building, he came over again, but each time he just kissed me, said he loved me and turned around to go back to the building. Not agitated or pleading to come with me.  It's so helpful when he seems content and settled. Unfortunately, upheaval is coming again soon.

He will probably be home mid-to-late January and, at this point, probably for good or at least the foreseeable future. I hope what we saw on Friday, is sustainable and he will continue to improve. Please pray about the logistics of bringing him home. I am going to start contacting in-home assistance agencies, and need to work on a regular schedule of activities, chores, exercise, therapy, Bible study, games, etc. He plays a lot of Sequence and sometimes Monopoly with the LSTs. I'll be looking for some volunteers to come help occupy him also. (hint, hint!)

Started this earlier in the week and just never got back to finish it, so will send it on until I can write another one.  Been a full, but productive week. I have talked with Mike a few times and each time he has been able to speak sensibly with me. I may hear him fuss at the staff, but he didn't get stuck and keep repeating over and over. A real plus!  We had a great Community Christmas Gathering at church on Wednesday night and I helped with a skit for that, the UMW met for a Christmas supper tonight at a restaurant in town, and Mom and I are going with our cousins, Betty & Bubba to a play tomorrow, so we are already celebrating Christmas BIG around here and haven't even done much decorating yet!  Christ the Savior is born! Hallelujah!

God at work.

The meeting today with Senator Frank Ruff and the Executive Director, Anne McDonnell, of BIAV went very well, I believe.  I simply shared our situation and the fact that there is no facility equipped to handle Mike, plus TBI doesn't fall under any of the established definitions. Anne spoke with Senator Ruff about the funding over the past 7-10 years, number of people being served vs the number needing services, the definition of the proposed Universal Waiver and the need for brain injury to be included in conversations about that waiver. Senator Ruff was sympathetic, but cautioned that whenever lines are shifted, someone always ends up in the proverbial crack. He did ask Anne to e-mail him the key points and numbers before December 5, his filing deadline.

Anne spoke also about the nursing facility BrainTree in Massachusetts and how that costs Virginia $1,000/day per person that is sent from Virginia. That is about 3X the cost of where Mike is, so if Virginia had a similar facility, that would mean 3 people could be served instead of 1, plus it would bring jobs to Virginia. Senator Ruff wondered if the training centers that are being closed across Virginia would be suitable facilities to be turned into something like BrainTree. I don't know if this is an original idea of his or if that has already been circulating, but it sounds good to me.  

I am not a political person, and I have no idea what may come of this meeting, but Anne was quite excited and God's hand was very evident in several ways. 1. How quickly and easily this meeting was set up. 2. Anne was in Richmond today. 3. Timing - 2 days before Senator Ruff has to have papers filed for the next session. 4. Both gave me names of people to contact who may be of help to our particular situation. 5. Our family friend, Harrison Moody, has contacted Delegate Dance to try to set up a meeting. 6. My uncle, Wendell, wrote his delegate. Anne knows her, so the circle is connecting.

I asked Senator Ruff if having family and friends write letters would help heighten TBI needs and action or just be annoying. He said if the delegate or senator is already supportive, then it doesn't really help to bombard that office. What is helpful is to try to get constituents across the state to contact their delegate and senator so that the entire state is hearing the same message, not just one or two districts. So, I believe Senator Ruff has received the message and will do what he can to promote action on behalf of TBI survivors.  For those of you living in other parts of the state, I would appreciate it if you could write a letter to your legislators. We are particularly asking for funding for services for TBI survivors, inclusion in a Universal Waiver that is not restricted by age, and development of facilities within the state to handle those with multiple issues and particularly (for folks like us) neuro-behavioral issues.

After the meeting, I decided to go see a movie. Hit it just right for the one movie that looked good to me (God again!). I arrived at 1:50 and the movie started at 2:10. It was a wonderful Christmas movie called The Christmas Candle based on a book by Max Lucado. I thoroughly enjoyed it. If you get a chance, go see it. 

Thank you for praying!

The Peace of God

Philippians 4:7 (ESV)

And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding,

will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

The last couple of weeks have been extremely stressful. I'll hit the major points.

• After receiving information from NeuroRestorative, the nursing home in South Boston, VA called to say that they were not equipped to handle Mike.
• NeuroRestorative (NR) believes our only option is a state hospital on a TDO (temporary detention order), which in this case means he is a danger to himself or others, because otherwise, state hospitals say they do not handle TBI survivors. This can only be done through the CSB (community service board) in his home area and as long as he is in a facility that can handle him, the CSB will not step in.
• That would mean Mike will come home and if we have a threatening situation, then we take him to an emergency room, and hope the CSB will refer him to the state hospital rather than just give him a shot and send him home (which was done twice previously). I don't really want Mike to go to a Psych facility, as the more he is confined, the worse he is; however, I also know I am not equipped to handle him.
• The only other possible option is to contact the over 200 facilities in Virginia, be turned down by the majority of them, have Mike on Medicaid, and then he could possibly be sent to BrainTree in Massachusetts. Virginia Medicaid has an agreement with BrainTree and there are several Virginia TBI survivors there now. This facility is experienced and equipped to handle all areas of Mike's care, plus they have a more progressive treatment plan for TBI survivors than NR. Virginia does not have any facilities like this. While this would make it difficult for me to see Mike, it may be the best possible place for him at this time. I have started typing the address labels for the 200+ facilities and Lisa at NR is mailing me the information she sent to the other nursing homes.
• One ray of hope in these past 2 weeks was a very extensive e-mail from the mother of a TBI survivor who shared her experience and knowledge from the past 12 years of her son's recovery. Her informative and encouraging e-mail is more valuable to me than anything I've heard or read over the past 19 months. Her son also has diffuse axonal injury, but the brain has continued to heal and try to be "efficient" despite severe frontal lobe damage and shrinkage. She said if she told her son about Mike's current condition, he would shake his head and say "early days". Her main advice to me was not to think in terms of long-term placement. Not to settle for the way things are now and never give up hope. 
• Brain Injury is so extremely slow, it is like no recovery that we have ever been familiar with in the past. Yet, there is still hope that Mike will get past this phase and become calmer and able to be at home, productive, and part of the family again.
• Dealing with Medicaid, NC Retirement System, learning about trust funds, and talking with various organizations and people, I learned that I didn't know what in the world I was doing! I have contacted the lawyer again to help me sort all of this out. She is reviewing what I have done, and I hope to hear from her tomorrow or Wednesday to know if she can help me.
• Some things happen very fast. I e-mailed our state senator, Frank Ruff, and will meet him face-to-face tomorrow, Tuesday, December 3 at noon to tell him the barriers we have faced in finding the right care for Mike in Virginia. I also invited Anne, the Executive Director of BIAV (Brain Injury Association of Virginia) to join us. I can share our personal story and Anne can speak more about what legislation is needed. Please pray about this meeting. I am going to ask Senator Ruff what would be the best way to get the attention of the state in this matter and will let you know what you can do after our meeting.  My brother-in-law, Ed, has drafted a template of a letter that can be personalized and sent to the various state legislators. If Senator Ruff thinks this is the best way, I'll post the template on here.
• Over the weekend, various family members fasted and prayed for our situation. This passage from Isaiah stood out to me. Isaiah 5:19 "Woe....to those who say, "Let God hurry, let him hasten his work so we may see it. let it approach, let the plan of the Holy One of Israel come, so we may know it." I have definitely asked God to hurry up, but that is not His way. On the same day, this insight from Luke 10:41,42 by Elizabeth Burkhart met me: "do not become so involved in details, so tied up in planning for the future that you forget to live today. only one thing is necessary, I am present here, now..."  Stay focused on God and praise Him continually.
•  I also thank God that He prompted Keegan and Amy to come for the weekend. It was such a joy to spend time with them. We talked, prayed, watched football and played games together. They were just what I needed to get my mind off of all of the above. 
• Another true God-incident....A friend of my cousin, sent me a small, yet powerful book called The Cycle of Victorious Living by Earl and Hazel Lee. Such perfect insight for this crucial time in our situation. Don't fret. Do commit, trust, delight and rest in the Lord. The Lee's quote Oswald Chambers as saying "All our fret and worry is caused by calculating without God."  Eph. 3:20-21 "Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory." "Use the power God has given you to do something about the situation that could cause you to fret." "Fret is often removed not by praying but by doing." I also liked what they said about "Commit-Hands Down". It is a great visual of releasing our hold by turning our palms down instead of up. Palms up, the object has to be taken from our hands and can leave traces of the object on our hands. Turning the palms down indicates truly releasing the object or situation totally to God's control. Delighting and rejoicing in the Lord is essential. Praising Him for who He is, not what He does.
• Today, I have had the greatest peace, joy, and lightness of Spirit. Something I have not had for quite some time. I believe the fervent prayers and fasting of our families, have truly lifted the heavy burden of stress I was carrying last week. A couple of times today, I felt the joy of Jesus bubbling up inside of me like a fountain about to overflow. Very unexpected and surpassing understanding - a joy and peace that can only come from the Lord. Our situation has not changed, but a battle was waged this weekend against the powers of darkness on our behalf and I am reaping the harvest of joy for which Christ won the victory long ago.  All praise to our Heavenly Father, Lord Jesus, and Holy Spirit! Philippians 4:6-7 from The Message sums it all up beautifully:

Philippians 4:6-7 (MSG)

Don't fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God's wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It's wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.

Amen! and Amen!