What a day....

 Today I'm going to start with the bright spot of the day.  About 2pm, we drove to Jordan Lake and enjoyed the peace and quiet and sunshine. We walked a little and then sat on a bench just soaking in the gentle lapping of the water on the sandy beach, feeling the sun on our faces (and my feet) and imagining we were in Palau. Mike took off his jacket to feel the sun on his arms, but I thought it was a bit too breezy and chilly for that. (except my feet!)

I wish I could forget the rest of the day. Some day when we are on the other side of this adventure, I may write a book which includes more detail, but now is not the time.

From start to finish here's a short summary:
1. I have a spray bottle in the bathroom with a mix of clorox and water always handy and very necessary this morning. (Use your imagination, you might figure it out.)
2. There is a nurse at LabCorp who I'm sure will never forget us.
3. Mike has 3 needle pricks and a red chest. He is SO strong.
4. Rod and I had quite a restraining workout this morning, I have a headache & my wrists are sore. (Am so glad I asked Rod to come with us today at the last moment yesterday - Thank you Holy Spirit for that prompt!)
5. Leave Rod and Mike in the car, run into the Pharmacy, come out....no Mike and Rod???
6. Mike stuffing food in his mouth. I really dislike carpet under the dining table.
7. Oh! Another bright spot...we got a urine sample! Back to LabCorp. Now we wait for results.
8. On our way to Jordan Lake, am so glad I can hold down the car door lock and he can't open the door.
9. Those trying-not-to-stare stares at Kroger, Mom's whispering to and hushing their children
10. Leave your seatbelt on! (deja vu?) No, I'm not removing my hand, it's the law! Ouch!  We need to cut your fingernails.
11. sore wrists, red chest, more clorox, another shower
12. laundry, always laundry
13. Dr. Schwarz is checking with insurance to get the wound vac back. Heavy sigh...
14. After forcing him into bed, he collapses and falls instantly to sleep. ahhhh

It's been a tough day and I really hope there is a light at the end of the tunnel, but it is hard to see it on days like this.  Today I was asking God "how long?" and thinking I really cannot wait to be with family and on the farm.  I just hope we don't make everybody crazy. I'm ok, just very tired of the struggle and not knowing what the problem really is. No one seems to know. I am happier with my reactions today in the midst of all the stress. Thank you, Holy Spirit, for reminding me to be compassionate.

Two steps forward, three steps back

Jude 1:20-21, 24-25

But you, dear friends, build yourselves up in your most holy faith and pray in the Holy spirit.

Keep yourselves in God's love as you wait for the mercy of

 our Lord Jesus Christ to bring you to eternal life.

To Him who is able to keep you from falling and to present you before His glorious presence without fault and with great joy-to the only God our Savior be glory, majesty, power

and authority through Jesus Christ our Lord, before all ages, now and forevermore! Amen.

Saturday after surgery the weather was rain-turned-to-snow and the Mike I had seen on Friday was no where to be found.  He was a determined soul who wanted to be out of the apartment and going somewhere in the car and, right or wrong, I refused.  We didn't need to go anywhere and didn't need to be on the roads. We did go for a walk, but that didn't suffice. The snow was beautiful. Large wet flakes that stuck to our jackets and hair.  Trying to get him interested in anything else was pointless for quite a while until he grew tired. I cleaned house and that evening my sister, Gayle, came bearing Chinese food which we all enjoyed. Sunday we went to church without incident and Mike was mostly quiet. Keegan came and hung out with him while Gayle and I cleaned out the spare bedroom closet. We went through boxes that hadn't been opened in years, threw out some things and repacked and labeled the rest.

The rest of the week was up and down.  Just about anything having to do with the bathroom has become a real battle. Dr. Gualtieri ordered some lab tests just to rule out any infection that might be causing this behavior. Today I took him to the wound clinic because an area beside the incision has broken open and looked yellowish. The therapist took measurements and a photo and was going to e-mail the Dr. to see if he thought anything else needed to be done.  It may be that the incision or this opening is very painful and Mike just can't communicate that to me.  Also, my idea about the acetaminophen didn't pan out so he's back to taking that for pain. 

Due to this erratic behavior, the therapists decided to stop therapies as of last Thursday. They felt it was not being beneficial to him at this time.  They do believe he could benefit from more therapy, but they are not seeing a steady progression. Some days he's almost non-responsive, some days fixated, and other days he is hyper and can't sit still or concentrate. He's been very antsy and seemingly uncomfortable. It is so frustrating to not know how to help him, plus very aggravating to have to fight with him over everything from brushing his teeth and changing his clothes to sitting down to eat and getting into bed. He may be in excruciating pain and I just have no idea! I am trying to stay in God's love and am so thankful that He is able to keep me from falling; although, I have not reacted well a few times.  I am re-reading Mark Batterson's book "Primal" and the following quote really hit me between the eyes this time:  

“…your pain doesn’t give you a free pass to say whatever you want to say however you want to say it. But just as you are responsible for your actions, no matter how right or wrong they are, you are also responsible for your reactions. And compassion is always the right reaction. I’m not saying there isn’t a place for rebuking, correcting, and exhorting. Sometimes that’s the most loving thing you can do. But even those things can be and must be done in the spirit of compassion.  In my experience, it’s much easier to act like a Christian than it is to react like one. Anyone can put on an act. But your reactions reveal what is really in your heart. And if you love God with all your heart, you won’t just act like it. You’ll react like it.”  

Last week, I felt angry. Plain and simple and I did not always react in a compassionate manner. I know there are stages of grief and this was a tough one.  Thankfully, Keegan was able to come to my rescue and he and Amy prayed over me on Tuesday night. As Colossians 3:5 says, I want to "put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature..." and Colossians 3:8a, 12-14 "But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage.....Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity."

Prayer Requests:

Wed., Feb. 27, 10:00am - LabCorp appointment - Please pray that Mike will be cooperative and they will be able to draw blood and get a urine sample. This may sound weird, but I'm hoping there is an infection or something that can be treated and make Mike more comfortable.

Wound heal properly - wisdom for Dr. Schwarz when he looks at e-mail.

Brain healing - honestly, it seems things are just getting worse. That's why I'm praying it's one of the above causing the problems.

Continence - think this may be caused by one of the above or the Risperdal.  Dr. G. is having me cut back on the dosage.

My reactions - staying in God's word and His presence, also staying compassionate, kind, gentle

packing and moving details

Praises: 

Sunday we had a wonderful time giving a shower for my future daughter-in-law, Amy. Carol came over on Saturday and did laundry, baking, cleaning, etc.  I tried to help between taking care of Mike and helping him with his K'nex projects.   We probably had 20+ people in our little apartment and had a lot of laughs, food and fun. Mike and Keegan went out for a few hours and played frisbee and watched frisbee golf, I think. He had fairly good days on Saturday and Sunday.  Keegan and Amy even opened one of their gifts, Ninja Master Blender, and made us all smoothies after the shower. Then they and Carol stayed and helped me clean up.

Keegan and Amy - Always thankful for them and so proud of their example and witness.

Rod, our new Comfort Keepers guy, has been wonderful, available, and flexible.  He and Mike have walked a lot, played Wii and built several K'nex models. He is helping me stay sane.

Dr. Mike, my chiropractor. My back was really hurting Monday and Tuesday last week.  Saw Dr. Mike on Wednesday and felt much better.  Saw him again today.  Hoping I can find one similar in Richmond. He uses percussion instruments and Dr. Rockwell protocol.  Anybody know a Chiropractor like that in the Richmond area?

Caleb called - he is now the Inventory manager at Origami Owl. www.origamiowl.com (check it out!) He has worked hard, sought to learn other areas and it has been noticed and rewarded.  We're proud of you, Caleb! 

sleep - I've been getting at least 6 or 7 hours of sleep every night!! Praise God!

So thankful for Gayle and Carol helping me in various ways and for having them here to talk with.

Well, it is midnight. I'm usually in bed by 10:30 or earlier so I'd better get to bed.  I so appreciate your prayers and love. We still need them very much. I love you.

Gradual Awakening

Ephesians 3:17b-21

And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge--that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen

God has certainly done immeasurably more than all I could have asked or imagined in the last two days.  I still feel exhilarated about the results of the surgery and how easy the day went yesterday. Guess I didn't realize how much it was weighing on my mind. I feel a huge burden has been lifted and cast away.  Mike went to bed early last night, I think about 6:45. I didn't expect him to stay there all night, but he did.  

He had one hyper episode this morning, and I think I've figured out that it's the acetaminophen.  I called the pharmacist and they said they've never heard of Tylenol causing agitation, but I'm going to stop giving it to him and see if it makes a difference.  I did not give him any yesterday morning before surgery and he was so calm. He had a problem with Hydrocodone, so I think it's possible. Either due to other meds or his body chemistry, the brain injury or some other factor. Ibuprofen seems to be fine and Neurontin/Gabapentin is a must.  After he calmed down, and I had taken care of some phone calls, etc., we went to the J. C. Raulston Arboretum and walked around and had a wonderful time.  The weather was gorgeous, upper 50's, sunny and best of all...the daffodils are blooming! My favorite flower as they were always the first to bloom and gave the promise of Spring, my favorite season, just around the corner. I was snapping photos, getting ideas of flowers, trellises we could make, and being excited that we'll be able to do yard stuff at Mom and Dad's. 

Even better than daffodils, Mike and I actually communicated a little today. He was responding to my questions or comments and there seemed to be more life in his eyes (he wasn't just staring straight ahead).  As we were leaving the park, I commented to him that it was so good to hear him respond and I wondered if he felt like he was waking up from something, wondering what was happening, and what he was thinking and feeling.  He said "It was boring and interesting."  I said "What the Arboretum?" Mike: "Yes."  Ha Ha!  We weren't quite on the same wavelength, but at least he  answered in his own words and that made me laugh with joy.  God has truly been filling me up the last 2 days, I feel such relief and joy, and am ever grateful for His great love for us. So wide, long, high, and deep that we will never find the end of it. After lunch, he even brushed his teeth on his own.

Barbara brought a casserole for our supper and then Cheryl came to hang out with Mike while I went to get my hair cut.  Mike got to ride in the convertible again and then they played Uno. Mike and I walked to the basketball court, shot hoops for a while, showered, played cards, enjoyed supper, played cards and watched TV, before he went to bed at 9. What a marvelous day. I am very hopeful that these glimpses of clarity become longer and more frequent with each passing day.  What a mighty God we serve.

The theme of almost everything I pick up to read these past couple of weeks has been about prayer and seeking God, spending time with Him, fasting, and praying His word.  I just love how God orchestrates that.  From books that have sat on a shelf for years, to a magazine in a waiting room, a devotional on the night stand at the farm, and a current magazine all hitting the same subject - that is God. Isn't it amazing that He wants to spend time with us?  May we each yearn and long to be in His presence more and more each day.  I'm going to go meet with Him now.  Hope you will too.  Thank you so much for praying for us, He is answering.  Now just go enjoy His company. :-)

Mighty People of Faith & Prayer - You Rock!

My precious prayer warriors:

I know many of you were doing serious battle for us today, because everything went so much better than I imagined or hoped. Thank you from the top, middle, and bottom of my heart!  :-)

We ate rather late last night (7:15p) and Mike stayed up until about 9pm.  He got up by himself this morning at 8:20a. I never mentioned food and neither did he. Got him showered, shaved, dressed, had our time with the Lord, took out the trash and recycle and by that time it was time to go. Praise God! It went so smoothly.  He was very calm at the hospital and could even answer most of the questions asked by the patient registration rep. In the Pre-op room, he mostly rested on the bed. I read out loud some excerpts from devotionals that my Mom had sent, while various medical staff came and went. They had a hard time getting the IV line into his arm.  One nurse tried & stuck him in both the right and the left and then went to get another nurse who put it in his left hand.  Dr. Schwarz was running late so we sat there for about an hour. By this time, his morning medication was beginning to wear off and before I could stop him, he pulled his IV out, so yet another nurse came and put it in his right hand. Then they wrapped it with yellow bumble bee tape to keep him from grabbing it.  Dr. Schwarz came as the nurse was putting this in and within 15 minutes he was taken to the OR.  It was 1:50p - just an hour after it was scheduled. The Dr. thought it would take about 1 hour and he thought it was best for Mike to come home today, unless something went awry or he found it was worse than he expected.

I went to the cafeteria. They have made some improvements there since August and had a cold vegetarian plate today that looked interesting.  I decided to try that and really enjoyed it.  Had couscous with onions, cucumbers, avocado, onion & herbs, black-eyed peas with other vegies, cold potato wedges with a creamy sauce, apple salad with nuts and cranberries and a really good bread with honey and sunflower seeds.  Was good to have something different.  Back upstairs, I sat and read until the Dr. came out about 3:45 with all good news.

The pocket had filled in more than the last time he had seen Mike, so he was able to cut away the really bad flesh that had become stagnant and pull the tissue and muscles together and stitch up the wound!!! WOO HOO!!!  No drain, no wound vac, no packing!  Just a bandage to leave on for 2 or 3 days and stitches that should come out in 3 weeks.  We are to follow up with Wound Care at WakeMed at that time.  This is so much better than what I imagined and more closure than I had hoped for. Thank you God and Dr. Schwarz!  I feel such relief to have this behind us, was shouting praises to God on the way home, and pray that it will now heal completely and have no more issues.

Mike was a little bit woozy when we walked from the car to the apartment. I fixed him some soup and crackers and now he is lying on his side in bed.  One of the discharge instructions is not to sit for 6 weeks.  Yeah, right.  Good thing Mike likes to walk and all, but he has been sitting more with this new medication. Guess it just means not to sit for long periods of time or all day or make a trip to Ohio, etc.!   Well, he's up, pacing, and repeating "watch TV" so better find something for him to watch.  The air mattress is beeping "low Pressure" and won't stop too so I've put in a call for service. Am glad I can turn it off.

I am so thankful for God's love and your love for us.  Happy Valentine's Day!

Anonymous Beautiful Bouquet - Thank you

To the very sweet, anonymous person(s) who sent me a beautiful Valentine's Day bouquet with a precious message, Thank You!  It arrived about 15 minutes before we left the farm, rode quite well in the car, and is brightening up our apartment. You gave me a very special, unexpected gift that puts a smile on my face every time I pass by them. Again, thank you. It was very thoughtful.

Virginia Doctor

10:23pm
Sent this about the Dr. to family earlier in the week and forgot to put it on here. 
After praying, going through the list sent to me by the Brain Injury Assoc. of Va., making some phone calls, following up on recommendations, closed doors (not taking new patients, new patient appt. not until June, out-of-network with BCBS, etc.), I have cancelled the appt. with the Center for Neurorehab (out-of-network) and made an appointment with Dr. Timothy Silver, who is the Medical Director of Sheltering Arms Hospital South in Midlothian, VA (suburb of Richmond). I was hoping to be in that area (just ease of location/distance), but had about given up on that. Curiously enough, he was not on the BIAV list, not recommended by anyone, but in the same practice as a Dr. that was recommended so I am trusting that the Lord's hand is in all of this. After making the appointment, I found the following pdf online, which is very encouraging and informative. We have an appointment April 18.  http://www.nicholasrizzo.com/arp//silverbio.pdf

Mom, Dad and I had a good talk last night. I just wanted to talk openly now that we've all had a week to get a feel for what it would be like to live together.  This will not be easy and will be a big adjustment for everybody. I am so grateful for my wonderful, loving parents who are willing to take us in and support us in any way they can. They are sacrificing a lot of peace and quiet and it will definitely be a disruption to their norm. I hope we'll be moved in the weekend before Easter. Mom and I try to work together to get meals served and cleaned up and keep the laundry going; although, there are times she's left with the majority of it, if I'm having to deal with Mike.  Mike stayed with Daddy tonight while Mom and I went to pick up their car and a pizza. When we got back, Mike had eaten almost an entire box of Vanilla Wafers and a partial bag of dates.  He was very determined to have the pizza RIGHT NOW! too, but we were able to hold him off and get it all on the table.  This morning his "flight pattern" was: up the stairs, into the bedroom, down the stairs, around the kitchen island, back up the stairs. He must have done this 10 times.  I was standing at the island checking e-mails, etc., and he started patting my head when he went by - was very sweet. We did a little organizing and cleaning in the "upper room" down at the milking parlor, where we may be able to store some things, and when I was giving him a shower, I thought he was going to fall backward he was so tired. But once out of the shower, he didn't want to sit or lie down. Just started his pacing. Tonight he was so tired, but resisted going upstairs. We played a few card games and then I set him up with his iPad and let him be for a while.  Finally got him upstairs and then had to wrestle with him to get him ready and in bed.  He literally almost falls over he is so tired, but his mind must be telling him to stay up, keep walking, you might miss something, or whatever. At one point today, I did make him sit on the couch/recliner and you could tell his body was exhausted, but his eyes held such fear. He just lay there, but his eyes were fixed on me and he looked so afraid.  I just wonder if he feels trapped in his own body, can't express what he's thinking or if he's in a lot of pain and the constant motion is to try to do something about it.  If I ask him, he is telling me he has pain more now than before.  I'm trying to keep ahead of it, but so hard to know. I did go back to giving him the neurontin and I think that helps.

I've started sleeping in the next bedroom and have gotten 6 hours of sleep straight the last couple of nights.  Is also nice because I can read before I go to bed, get up and have time with the Lord and get myself ready for the day before he gets up.  When we are in the same room, as soon as he hears me get up, he gets up. I really need that time. Mom has a devotional book on the night stand in this room called "Daily in His Presence" by Andrew Murray with Bruce Wilkinson.  The beginning devotions are about taking the time to adore God and seek Him just for Him.  Not what He can do for me, or my long list of prayer requests, but just desiring to be with Him.  To yearn for Him. Isaiah 26:9 My soul yearns for you in the night.  And to be quiet and listen to God.  This was also the subject of the sermon Sunday. Just like it is hard for Mike to stop and rest, we too can be just like that. Unable to stop our minds from the myriad of thoughts, to do lists, plans, and schedules long enough to be still and quiet before God.  I love this quote from the January 5 devotion "Who would dispute the fact that when a human being in his or her insignificance meets with God in His glory, that which God has to say must have infinitely more worth than what that person has to say?"  Have you ever been with someone who barely takes a breath, and you can tell doesn't really hear you when you speak, because they are jumping in and talking over you? More concerned with what they have to say than anything you could share or say?  I think that's how most of my conversations with God go.  I have a very hard time quieting my mind.  So that's my challenge - to work at adoring and desiring God for who He is and quieting my mind so I can really listen to Him - for I know what He has to say is of far greater worth and I need to hear every word. Love you all.

Happy Valentine's Day Surgery

10:15 pm
Trust, trust, trust.  The Lord is with us. The Lord will provide. The Lord knows. It will be alright.

Heavy sigh.....received a call yesterday that another more immediate surgery needs to take precedence over Mike's surgery on Tuesday. At first it was going to be postponed until next Tuesday, because that's the only day the Dr. does surgeries, but graciously (Thank you, Lord!) he made an exception and Mike's surgery is Valentine's day. Arrive at 10:45am, surgery at 12:45.  Of course, Mike cannot have anything to eat or drink after midnight, so please pray for us that morning.  He likes his food! Thankfully, I am allowed to give him his regular meds.

Yesterday was a fantastic day.  We ran an errand for the farm, Mom fixed lunch and had Hugh, TR, Coley, & Erin join us, we finished trimming and cleaning out around the rose bed, took a walk, and Mike sat and read the Bible for quite a while.  He got hung up on a few phrases with some interesting twists and sat in Dad's golf cart and tried to get it going for a half hour or more, but all in all, much improved.  This morning he was a bit frantic and has had several repeating episodes today. We went for a walk and his body seemed to become too heavy for his legs or something and he started to fall over.  I was trying to stabilize him, but we both fell. No one hurt and thankfully, one of the farm workers was close by and came and got Mike up for me. We rested at the horse barn for a bit, then walked some more before calling Mom to come and get us. I have the sweetest Mom. Before we arrived on Saturday, she had cleared out the closet in the middle bedroom and all the drawers in the dresser and chest of drawers so that we could move in.  It's so much easier than living out of a suitcase and was so thoughtful. We've never had so much drawer space!  We've always shared a dresser.    Thanks, Momma, I love you!

Am feeling especially weary and drained tonight.  Mike has been sleeping, or at least staying in the bed the whole night for several nights. I've had a couple of good nights sleep when I take medication, but then feel sort of woozy in the morning. No meds last night and very little sleep.  Had something from a devotional I wanted to share, but it's upstairs and I'm ready to call it quits for tonight.  Will share another time. Coveting you prayers and God's healing touch.

Such a difference

On Friday, I decided we might try to go to the farm on Saturday and stay a week with Mom and Dad, if all went well.  According to the weatherman it wasn't supposed to be too cold and a change of pace would be good for both of us.  Saturday morning started out a bit shaky, with Mike spitting out his medicine first thing, but after a shower and pacing, he finally settled down a bit to eat breakfast. I put his medicine on the table and told him what each prescription and vitamin were and what they were for and that I would leave it up to him whether he was going to take them or not.  He took every one.  He still did quite a bit of pacing, but all in the apartment and not near as frantic as he had been on previous days. I put on a movie, worked on laundry, and nonchalantly started packing. He became interested in the movie, I finished packing, we loaded the car, did a couple of errands and arrived just before dark at Mom and Dad's.

Mike did great at church yesterday and at the Souper Bowl dinner after church.  He became a bit restless and probably too much stimulation at that point, so we left right after eating.  He took a nap and then we went for a long walk with Tracey over to the horse barn and back.  We all enjoyed watching the Super Bowl last night; although I was cheering for the 49ers.  Not that I know anything about them, I just never have cared for the Ravens.  Saw on the news tonight, though, that one of the Ravens players, is the guy that the movie "The Blind Side" was based on, so that was a great continuing part of that story.

Today has been so great.  Mike was calm and cooperative this morning PRE-meds. He even continued to sit on the couch and read the Bible after I had gotten up to help Mom with breakfast and stayed there until I came and got him to eat! After breakfast he went outside and started pulling weeds.  I joined him later and we worked outside for a couple of hours.  He came in and rested on the couch, we had lunch about 2pm and then we took a short walk and worked some more.  I quit and came in about 5 and he stayed out there until dark.  While I was helping him get his coat off, there was a distinct upward curve to his mouth.  Beautiful!  After a shower and supper, he was ready for bed and I'm about ready now too.
I cut back a little on his medication today, to see if he would have a bit more energy and stability on his feet and since Mom and Dad have a blood pressure machine so I could check his BP.  He has done great and his BP was 119/75 at supper.  This is so exciting and he did so great today!  And it is such a joy to be here with Mom and Dad and be able to do some little things for them too.  What they are doing for us is huge!  It will be hard to go back to the apartment, but if Mike continues to do this well, I believe he will be able to understand, at least partially, that it's only for a little bit longer.  Daddy has a long list of projects we can help him with, so we have to get back here soon! LOL! (If you know my Dad, he always has a long list of projects!) I love you, Daddy & Momma! :-)

This is SUCH a difference and I praise God for the change!  I just have to think that some of the craziness was due to bad medication combinations, withdrawal from some meds, or just not the right ones for him and am so thankful that the prescriptions are dwindling and the Risperdal is helping him function and calm down, God is healing his brain and answering all our prayers, and there is work to do at the farm! I'm sitting with the heating pad, but love being able to get out there and do some manual labor too.  My tired tonight is a very good tired.  G'night.

Less is More

Good Morning! (8:40am)

It is a cold, cloudy, blustery morning here and Mike doesn't want to get out of bed yet, so I'm having a very peaceful, quiet morning - Praise God!  Time alone with the Lord, got dressed and ate some breakfast, doing laundry, and now updating y'all/journaling.

As I shared in the last post, Monday was a very good day. Monday night was a totally different story.  Ed came bringing supper, Catherine was here helping me with household chores and doing some baking. It took a while for Mike to settle down and eat, but he did and then went to bed around 8:30pm. About 11:30 or 12 he woke up and even after 2 Trazodone, he paced from the bed to the bathroom, shaved, turned on lights, - quietly at first then he pulled the covers off of me "Get up, Jennifer!" until finally at 2am, I had enough and went to the spare bedroom, put sheets on and fell asleep until about 5:30.  I went in to check on him and he was sitting all slumped over on the edge of the bed with the bathroom light on.  I was able to get him changed and into bed and then he slept until about 9am.

Tuesday went well for the most part.  Cheryl, the volunteer caregiver, came and he told her he was glad to see her. Yay!  They went for a short walk, played cards and Wii.  I made phone calls, took a walk, and went through papers getting all our tax stuff together.  Tuesday afternoon, we had one hyper episode where he went outside - I was only a little bit behind him getting out the door, but when I got outside, I couldn't see him anywhere. Then I saw someone sitting in a car and lo and behold it was Mike!  Sitting in someone else's Mini Cooper! I got him out and had to redirect him several times, before the meds started calming him down. I am learning when I need to give him his next dose of Risperdal.  (This is the medicine that I thought was "strong, scary stuff when he came out of the hospital that 2nd time, but evidently it was just a bad combination of meds at the time that made him slumped over, wobbly, totally out of it. Because now it is my life-saver!) As Dr. Gualtieri say "Less is More" when it comes to medication.  Right now Mike is only on 4 prescriptions which is much less than before and one of those is an antibiotic which finishes today and the other is neurontin, which we are cutting back on and will end in a few days.  Then we'll be down to only 2 - woo hoo!  I have not needed to give him the Buspar with the increase in Risperdal and last night he would not take the Trazodone and I didn't hear him all night. Hallelujah!  Now if I could just sleep. :-(

Tues., Wed., and Thurs., mornings for about an hour (until the meds take effect) he has been rather hyper.  Yesterday morning it was the car thing again so we struggled around in the parking lot for about 15-20 minutes while I kept him away from other people's cars, before I could get him inside.  Then yesterday afternoon, we went to mail a package to Caleb. I had "perishable" written on the side and Mike started to get very anxious and trying to open the package, saying I was giving away our food.  Thanks to the kindness of another customer in line who followed Mike out the door and got him turned around, I was able to get the package mailed. Then the fixation was on seeing that we had food at home.  Just before the post office, we had enjoyed lunch at Panera (thanks Sandi & John) and had both eaten quite well; however, now Mike thought he was hungry and wanted to see our food.  I drove around for a while, after giving Mike his Risperdal, waiting for it to take effect.  We got home and he checked out the refrig, pantry, etc.  We ate our bakery items from Panera and then I tried to take us to the Cary Arts Center but he said "I don't have need of an art center."  LOL!  So we had a productive time at home going through files.  I purged and he shredded.  Was so glad to get that done and he was a huge help! Thank you for praying, thank God for Dr. G and medication that is finally stabilizing and Thank you Lord for calmness and productivity with Mike!

10:35am  Rod, from Comfort Keepers arrived at 9. Mike got up and I got him showered, today's fixation is still food plus shoes. Rod got his breakfast ready so as soon as he was dressed, he ate, now they are playing Wii.  My goal today is to finish paperwork, call another Dr. in Richmond, answer e-mails and go through the spare bedroom closet.  

11:40 - Where does time go?  Don't think I've shared much on here about future plans, but I am actively working toward moving us to Virginia with my parents.  The apartment complex is working with us to shorten our lease and right now our target date is the end of March to be out.  Will definitely need help packing, or occupying Mike while packing is being done.  Maybe he won't get as hyper since he's more calm now, but that would be the type of thing to set him off.  We have an appointment in Richmond, VA at the Center for Neurorehabilitation for March 7, but now I have some questions that I'm trying to get answered and may check into another Dr. in that area.  The Center for Neurorehabilitation sounds really great and a one-stop place for brain injury; unfortunately, they are out-of-network with Mike's insurance so it would mean more deductibles and maximums to meet and more out-of-pocket expenses. Richmond is about 1 hour from my parents' farm, so not as accessible, but if we can get Mike into some sort of work routine at the farm, that will be excellent therapy and release for him.  For those who live in that area, please be praying about how you might be able to help occupy or supervise Mike for an hour or two, small jobs - like raking or picking up pine cones in your yard, weaving potholders, putting jigsaw puzzles together, etc. Maybe you know someone who might be available or looking for extra income, any brainstorming, contacts, and ideas are appreciated.  Being in a familiar place to Mike and around more people, I hope, will make a huge difference in our day-to-day life.

I need to get busy. Have a wonderful day!