The Leg

Mike became so calm last Tuesday evening when I rolled him outside. He sat and studied his leg the entire time. That left leg is usually in constant motion and often has scrapes and skin tears on it. After my last blog, a friend sent me a link to Limbkeepers and I ordered a pair of leg sleeves. Will take them this week and see if it helps to protect that battered leg.

I made an unexpected trip to see him because he had been moved to the long-term hall the day before and I wanted to check on him. He was doing much the same as always and has great nurses and CNAs on that hall. The reason for the move was that his roommate, dear Mr. B. had died on the previous Saturday. I was sorry to learn of this on Monday morning and miss him, yet am glad for him that he now breathes easily and walks with Jesus. When I saw him the Wednesday before his passing, he was struggling so to breathe and sounded bad. I brought him ice cream and banana bread, 2 of his favorites. He said he couldn't eat much, but he was sure going to try to eat the ice cream and he did, but I don't think it stayed.  It was really different to go there and not see Mr. B whom I had come to love.

Mike and Mr. B were on the short-term hall or rehab wing. Mike was moved there because Mr. B didn't want to move when he was done with rehab and became long-term, so they asked me if I minded Mike being moved there. It was a good move at the time and I was thankful for all that Mr. B did in looking out for Mike. Mike is now in a room with Mr. P. whose wife comes every day. They are from India and don't speak a lot of English, but are kind and the Mrs. often takes the Mr. outside also, so we've seen a lot of each other when I'm there.

The good part of Mike's move is I know almost all of the nurses and CNAs on that hall and they seem more permanent. He's been receiving good care, but I do happen to think these are some of the best at the facility and continuity is so helpful. Somehow I think he'll get better care on this side.

Tomorrow is Mike's 63rd birthday. I plan to go for a short visit while a friend of Mom's comes to visit her. According to the nurse, the medication has gotten into his system and he is doing better at night, plus one of the CNAs told me they have not had any problems with him since he came to their side. I'm so thankful for this reprieve from agitation and stress however long or short it may be. Thank you so much for your prayers for Mike and for me.

Crying Heart

My heart is crying today. Have you ever had one of those days that nothing in particular happened, yet a pile up of emotions suddenly surfaces without warning and comes crashing out uncontrollably? Yes? No? Well, I have and today is one of them. It started after giving a prayer request for Mike in church and then a hymn about hopes and dreams and my emotions were spilling out of my eyes and sobs coming from the depths of my heart.

Mike has had a couple of rough weeks. I never know what to expect when I get a call at any time of the day or night. It's not an emergency, but...Mike fell out of the wheelchair.  Mike has a skin tear on his left leg. Mike won't stay in the bed. Mike is extremely agitated and we're having to keep him at the nurses station. Mike has a skin tear on his hand. Mike fell out of bed. Mike might have bruises on his arm because we had to hold him down to get blood-work to check for infection. Mike might have a UTI. Mike threw up.

He almost always has skin tears on his left shin. That's the leg that he keeps in almost constant motion. One day, as I came down the hall, he had a hardback book scraping it along his shin, he hits it on the wheelchair or a table and who knows what else. They try to bandage it, but he pulls the bandages off. We're going to try support hose type socks which hopefully he won't be able to remove.

This week I requested to speak with the psych PA and asked her if there was anything we can try to calm him. Instead of something new she wanted to try going back up on the Seroquel, but it seems to have back-fired or isn't in his system yet. I received a call last night that Mike was more agitated and almost fell out of the wheelchair, but since he was seated at the nurses station, they were able to prevent the fall.

Wednesday was unusually interesting. Our friend, Kristin, from NC drove up for a visit, meeting me at the facility. I was feeding Mike out on the covered deck when she arrived. It was quite hot, so after he finished we went inside and tried to walk with him in the cool. As we came down the hall, another resident was in the hall with his rollator on which he had a radio. For some reason, Mike wanted to ram his walker into this resident. Kristin and I were able to maneuver him away and head in the other direction. Then one of the staff started talking with Mike and he rammed into her and started following her. She laughed and told him to come get her and he sure tried! Whichever way she went, Mike followed and if she stopped, he ran into her. He was picking up speed as he went too. I told her she had aroused the competitive nature in Mike. She continued with us until we were back at his chair. 

We thought we would get him to sit down, but now he rammed into the chair, so I figured - can't hurt! I asked Kristin to steer the wheelchair while I held on to Mike and we sailed around the halls and nurses station with Mike intent on shoving that chair as hard as he could. When we would make a U turn, he would speed up and almost lose his balance trying to keep up with the chair. It was strange, but he was determined so we went around at least 2 times, maybe 3. The painters and nurses were getting a real kick out of watching us. One painter said he was going to start timing us. Crazy! By the time we got Mike in his chair to sit, he was breathing heavily.

A fairly new CNA had stopped me one day several weeks ago and asked me how I got Mike to walk with me. I told her and this past week she came to his room and excitedly told me that Mike had walked with her and the PT assistant for probably 20 minutes one day. I was so happy to hear that and so thankful for her willingness to try. She promised that she will continue to try to walk with him whenever she has the opportunity. I am quite grateful.

One of my other stressors this week has been the Creamery bookkeeping. The point-of-sale and accounting software were not communicating properly and trying to figure out the issue with software support was frustrating. It's still not completely straight, so I will do battle with that again tomorrow. Technology: time-saving when it works and time-consuming when it doesn't. One thing for certain is that every time I have a problem I sure do learn more. 

I have struggled this week with anxiety, depression, stress, and an overall tiredness of this never-ending journey. I know God sees, cares, has a plan, I know it. I know I am so blessed with family, friends, and many comforts and ease, I know it. I read about the persecuted Christians and martyrs and all that they have or are enduring and feel ashamed at my wimpiness. They have stood the tests, endured the torture, watched as loved ones were beaten or killed and yet stayed strong. They are my encouragement, my heroes, my real-life examples to never give up or give in to the emotions and feelings that would bury me. Compared to them my life is so easy.

Then, of course, the greatest example of all is our Lord Jesus Christ, who willingly came knowing the pain and suffering He must bear on our behalf. He did it all for the love of His Father and for us. What great love. Because of His great love, I can let the tears and emotions come, but not be overcome to the point of despair and no hope. He is with Mike, He is with me and He is with you, if you only believe. 

So, while my heart is crying, I will draw my strength from Christ and those who have been such a great cloud of witnesses for me. 

Hebrews 12:1-3

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, 

let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. 

And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, 

fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. 

For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, 

and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. 

Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, 

so that you will not grow weary and lose heart."

Family Gatherings

I don't know why, but I'm not that fond of the word "reunion". Maybe it conjures up scenes from movies where relatives are dreading the annual family reunion and having to listen to Uncle George's stories or enduring Great Aunt Agatha's tales of when she was young or, worse yet, someone telling embarrassing stories about them. I prefer to say I'm looking forward to the Family Gathering. To me it feels warmer somehow and I had the distinct pleasure of not one, but two Family Gatherings in July.

The first was the gathering of the Rice family. I always look forward to our gatherings as we spend a lot of time talking and playing card or board games. I genuinely enjoy and love my in-law family which is a huge blessing from God! It's the first time we have all been together in over 7 years and, of course, 7 years ago Mike and I didn't have 2 daughters-in-law and 5 grandchildren; however with our boys we did usually get with his family at Christmas. With one son and his family in Arizona, and Mike incapacitated, it has not been easy to get us all in one place, but on July 17 we all converged at an AirBnB for 3 nights not too far from Mike. It was wonderful and I was one happy Mom/Grammy! 

Our little hiking troopers.

We enjoyed lots of talking, laughter, board and card games, swimming, hiking, eating and I was able to get to know my Arizona grands much better than via the internet. (I'm thankful for that, but it is not the same as in person!) It was HOT and HUMID, but thanks to a pool and Richlands Creamery ice cream we made out fine. I brought along 10 different quarts so that the Ohio and Texas branches of the Rice family could give it a try. We had no trouble finishing it all before our time together was done. Caleb and nephew, Vincent, did most of the cooking/grilling which was a hot job for them, but they did a superb job and all the food was delicious.

Mike and I surrounded by his Mom, our children and grands!

Thursday morning we picked up Mike and took him to a nearby park. Thanks to Mark and Rogelio, we were able to get him into and out of the van. Mr. Omm was present the entire time, and he showed no signs of recognizing the rest of his family. After eating some ice cream and everyone having a chance to speak with him, we returned to the facility and let him walk the halls, fed him lunch, and then he was tired.  Mark and Jenney returned to see him the next day and they said he was sitting at the nurse's station and Mr. Omm was not around.

Can you believe she's 90?

On Saturday, July 20, while the rest of the Rice family headed to their respective states and homes, Caleb, Keegan, their families and I headed to Wilsons, VA to the next family gathering. This time it was on my Mom's side - the Hawkes/Dews family. I enjoyed visiting with aunts, uncles, and cousins - a few of which I had not seen in years, plus I met some of their grandchildren.  We also included celebrating Mom's 90th birthday which was on July 13. Praise God she is doing quite well.

Since I rarely get to see all of my grandchildren, I really spent most of my time with them, plus we stayed at a neighboring farm which was a true blessing. After so much travel, so many people and so much heat, it was nice to have a place of cool and quiet to escape to before we all had a melt down! LOL! The evenings gave me a chance to spend time with my adult children and we enjoyed playing games way too late!

It was so hot outside that it wasn't great weather to do much, but I was able to take my little ones for a ride on my golf-cart and we walked around the calf barns, plus of course we visited the Creamery.

"Hello cows!"

Ice cream!!!

So happy to have all my little ones and big ones in
church with me, along with my Mom, siblings and
their families, cousins, aunts, and uncles. 

A week goes by way too fast, but I thoroughly enjoyed every minute with all of my family and cherish the memories we made together. My heart is full and overflowing. God has blessed me beyond measure.

I love my growing family!

Psalm 127:3-5a

Children are a heritage from the Lord,

    offspring a reward from him.

Like arrows in the hands of a warrior

    are children born in one’s youth.

Blessed is the man

    whose quiver is full of them.