Encourage One Another

Hebrews 10:23-25

Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess,

For he who promised is faithful. And let us

consider how we may spur one another on toward love

and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together,

As some are in the habit of doing,

but let us encourage one another—and all the more

as you see the Day approaching.

Due to Mike’s broken nose emergency, I missed the opportunity to write about a very special visit that occurred the week before his fall. Way back in the 1980’s :-), when we were in Palau, Dan & Kaylynn Mills, who are with Campus Crusade for Christ (now CRU), were also there. They are currently serving in New Zealand and Papua New Guinea where they have been for over 16 years. This summer they were home for a couple of months furlough and included a trip to our area to visit with Mike and me. What a blessing their visit was to me! I felt like I had received a cup of cold water for my thirsty soul all the way from New Zealand. Just like Proverbs 25:25 says: Like cold water to a weary soul is good news from a distant land.

They arrived on Thursday night (at the farm) where we enjoyed supper with Mom and Dad, a brief walking tour of the farm before dark, and I even put Kaylynn to work helping me peel and cut up cucumbers to get them ready to make cinnamon pickles. (they are delicious, by the way!) While we worked, the three of us talked and shared and encouraged one another with what the Lord has been teaching us and our families in the more than 20 years since we had seen each other. There has been a recurring theme in a lot of my readings lately and what a joy to be able to talk with them about it. (That’s a post that I am prayerfully and thoughtfully working on little by little. So…more on that another day.)

That Friday we went to visit Mike. Kaylynn rode with me and the miles few by as we talked the entire time. Dan drove separately because they would leave from Stanardsville to drive to Northern, VA where they were speaking on Sunday. At first Mike just looked at them and didn’t say much. We played a few games of Sequence and then took Mike out for ice cream. He did fine in the car and when Dan asked him what classes he taught in Palau he answered right away and then knew who they were and remembered their son. At the ice cream shop, he said he didn’t want his cone dipped in chocolate, (the rest of us did). After we all got our ice cream, he kept looking at Dan’s so I asked him if he wanted to try mine. He did. He became stuck on his “oooo”, and I had to remind him to eat his ice cream. Once he finished his, he reached over and took the rest of mine and ate it too. :-)

Back at The Harbor, we stayed with Mike a bit longer, but he was getting tired so we got him settled in bed and left. Dan, Kaylynn, & I had a chance to sit on the front porch and “debrief” before they left and again they were such a blessing and encouragement to me. They are such genuine, loving, open and honest lovers of Jesus and it is so easy to be with them and talk with them. I came home feeling much refreshed in spirit. As Christians, we are not to stand alone, we need each other for encouragement and accountability and I thank God for the time with Dan & Kaylynn.  Proverbs 27:17 As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.  Thank you Dan & Kaylynn for taking the time to come see us!

It’s sort of “The Summer of Missionary Friends”. Just a couple of weeks ago, I had a brief visit with another family also with CRU. Steve was in Palau briefly during our time there. He and his wife and one of their children stopped by the farm for a couple of hours on their way to NC. Though brief, it was great to see them, as well. They now serve at the Florida headquarters and are instrumental in preparing missionaries who are going out to various places throughout the world. They had served for many years in Japan.

Today, I am at a hotel in Orange, VA awaiting the arrival of our dear friends, Gert & Elke, with whom we served in Palau for several years. They have made trips down to the US and we have made trips up to Canada also over the years. You may remember that Elke came and spent a couple of weeks with me two summers ago while Mike was in Blacksburg, VA. I am greatly looking forward to time with them, as well.

I took this morning to get this blog written and uploaded, plus I hope to continue to read, pray and work on the other post. It’s nice and quiet here and I don’t feel like I need or should be doing other things. I spent most of the day yesterday with Mike at The Harbor, so am taking advantage of this peaceful, quiet place and some time alone.

This past Wednesday, I received a call from Liesa at The Harbor saying that due to Mike’s recent falls and resulting injuries, they wanted to speak with me. I had already planned to come up on Friday so we scheduled 10:30am. I took a long walk Wednesday night and gave my worries and fears to God and trusted Him for whatever was coming on Friday. My sister, Gayle, came on Wednesday for a few days, and again, what a blessing to have the fellowship of Christians to share our burdens and help us keep our focus. We had “iron sharpening iron” conversations also.

The meeting went well and I really appreciated that as soon as the new administrator joined the meeting she said: “I don’t know what has been said so far, but I just want you to know that we are not talking about discharging Mike.” Phew! She knew exactly where I thought the meeting might be headed. Everyone is just concerned that his falls have dramatically increased in the last few weeks and we needed to brainstorm ways to keep him safe. There was even one time that he was standing right next to a med tech and then suddenly was on the floor. He wasn’t even walking! The only thing that came to my mind was that maybe he has a hip or knee giving out on him. He had arthritis in his right hip prior to the accident, so I mentioned that. The speed with which he walks is still a definite concern also. I had brought his walker, but the head nurse is concerned that it could cause more problems than solutions. She is going to talk with Physical Therapy and see if they will come back and work with him and ask what they think of the walker.

It seemed to me that I always got the calls about his falls in the evening or at night, so I asked if that was a recurring trend. Jane, the administrator, brought out his records and every fall has occurred between 6:00-9:00pm.  Either he is tired at that time of night, or something is out of balance during that time. We discussed trying to find volunteers from local churches or school groups that might come in and be with Mike some during those hours. I had also thought of contacting UVA and seeing if there are any students studying brain injury that would like some hands on experience with a TBI survivor. If any of you have contacts in these areas, are in a church that might be interested in this as a ministry, please let me know. It is true that Mike does better with one-on-one supervision for the most part. He gets tired of having someone with him all the time, but he does like attention and cognitively does better when someone is interacting directly with him.

Mike’s center of gravity has definitely shifted forward. He walks slightly bent over and this causes his balance to be off. All day yesterday, I spoke softly, but firmly with him about standing tall, looking forward (not down) and walking slowly. He could do it with constant reminders, but if I didn’t say anything, his footsteps became rapid and his body over his toes. He also shuffles his feet and keeps them too close together which does not give him a good base and more easily trips him.

He did wonderful all day yesterday, we could converse, he walked out to the car with me carrying an empty box, we practiced walking up and down the halls, and he even made it to the bathroom, a couple of times, on his own. Meals are a challenge. He tends to eat way too fast and doesn’t like to be told to slow down. At supper last night, it all fell apart. He became very anxious, even shaky at one point. He would not stay seated, and was about to eat the napkin. He ate all of his supper, 2 rolls that I brought from home and then I asked for a bowl of applesauce. Once he knew the applesauce was coming, he finally relinquished the napkin to me, but still would not sit down. After he ate the applesauce, I got him to his room and in bed, only to have him hop up to go to the bathroom. He sat in there for a long time, then back to bed and right back up again. Something is definitely going wrong at that time of night.

As I was leaving, I was able to speak with Jane and tell her my observations. She is going to have the staff keep a closer eye on him during that time, and speak with Dr. B next week, also. I was glad I stayed and was able to see what might be happening on a regular basis.

Mike has a new roommate. His former roommate passed away last week. His new one doesn’t look much older than Mike, physically seems very fit, but spent most of the day fretting and looking for his wife. It’s a very pitiful situation.

On a funnier note, one of the women yesterday was going from room to room, declaring that this was her house and nothing was leaving it! I was organizing Mike’s stuff, while he rested, and she came in the door and asked me what I was taking. I told her nothing, just organizing my husband’s things. “Your husband!? Who is that?!” she said. “His name is Mike.” I answered. She peered around me at Mike, seemed satisfied, and moved on to the next room. Ha! Later, when I was leaving, I heard a shout, and looked back to see her coming out of Mike’s room, evidently she had gone in there and his new roommate shouted at her to get out! It’s rarely dull around there.

Well, this is too long again, but one last thing. Mike’s 59th birthday is on August 26. I hope he is having a good day today and that we can take him out for ice cream and then I would love to take him to a church and out to eat tomorrow for something special and out of his norm. Would you please pray that we would be able to do that? Thank you. I know he would enjoy receiving cards also.

422 William Mills Drive
Stanardsville, VA 22973